Hopping on Pop

In the Dr. Seuss children’s classic Hop On Pop, readers travel through pages of rhyming word pairs, with the usual whimsical cartoon characters acting out the scenes (ex. “All Ball, we all play ball” and “Day Play, we play all day”). It’s not until about halfway through the book where you see the title pair, “Hop Pop”.  And when I saw “STOP, you must not Hop on Pop”, I decided Dr. Seuss was referring to the latest junk food mashup, “Pepsi x Peeps”.

This blog often comments on sweets – so much so I should probably have a category called “sugar”.  I’ve talked about Halloween candy, chocolate, and licorice, and it’s a little unsettling I’ve discussed doughnuts in two of the last ten posts.  Naturally, my literary sugar addiction couldn’t resist a word or two on a truly disturbing concoction.  Just in time for Easter, Pepsi is advertising a Peeps-flavored soft drink.  I’m trying to get my taste-buds imagination around this “pillowy-soft and sweet” marshmallow-flavored cola.  I can’t taste it, can you?  All I come up with is sugar.  Lots and lots of sugar.

You know Peeps.  Of course, you do.  The colorful marshmallow bunnies and chicks are the hot item every Easter in the U.S. and Canada.  Consumer demand for the cute little creatures means Just Born Quality Confections cranks out 2 billion every year.  Naturally, Peeps has moved past Easter to be available year-round, especially for other holidays.  Just Born even expanded the product line beyond candy, most notably with a Peeps-flavored line of lip balms.

Courtesy of PepsiCo.

With off-the-charts (and inexplicable) demand for Peeps, I shouldn’t be surprised Pepsi injected the flavor into its latest hybrid drink.  But here’s what bothers me.  Even if marshmallow-tasting cola is your thing (and you should have your taste buds examined), why does it have to be “Pepsi x Peeps”?  It’s not as if the marshmallow taste of Peeps is unique. (It might as well be “Pepsi x Lucky Charms”.)  The appeal of Peeps is exactly what’s not in the Pepsi product: fluorescent colors, cute little creatures, and sugar-dusted spongy-soft marshmallows.

I consider “Pepsi x Peeps” a disservice to marshmallows everywhere.  Marshmallows deserve their place in more respectable foods.  Oozing out of S’mores around the campfire.  Adorning sweet potato casserole on Thanksgiving.  Buried in Rocky Road ice cream.  Abundant in Rice Krispy treats.  Floating gracefully in a sea of hot chocolate.  But reduced to a mere flavor, wandering aimlessly amidst the carbonation bubbles of a cola?  That’s just harsh.

A more deserving “frankenfood”

No matter.  Consumers love new products, especially combos of tastes that were already good by themselves.  Burger King combined Cheetos and Mac ‘n’ Cheese for a carb-loaded side dish.  Taco Bell combined Doritos and tacos into one of its all-time best-selling entrees.  And Reese’s perfected peanut butter and chocolate as a candy (as did many others as an ice cream).

Courtesy of PepsiCo.

I won’t be buying “Pepsi x Peeps” anytime soon.  But neither will you.  In the ultimate snub, this promotion is not for a product you will find on your grocery store shelves anytime soon.  Instead, you can only “win” the drink by hashtagging #HangingWithMyPeeps on your springtime photos.  3,000 of the most creative Instagram and Twitter promotions will win three-packs of the colorful cans.  I won’t be entering.  Instead, I’ll be expending my limited social media energy elsewhere.

I was raised in a Coke household so maybe it’s natural for me to knock Pepsi down a peg or two.  But they’re kind of asking for it when they’ve already test-marketed products like “Pepsi Holiday Spice” and “Pepsi Salted Caramel”.  They even amped the caffeine level in one of their varieties to promote it as a ‘breakfast drink”.  Pepsi will stop at nothing to get your business.  Including coercing you to provide free advertising on social media.  Suckers.

Stay strong, little one

I hope “Peepsi” amounts to nothing more than an out-of-reach sweepstakes giveaway.  I hope marshmallows soon return to their roles as cute, colorful, edible animals.  C’mon, Pepsi – the Easter Bunny wants you to know: Stop hopping on pop!

Some content sourced from Laura Miller’s YouTube audiobook, “Hop on Pop”,  the People.com article, “Pepsi and Peeps Have Joined Forces to Create Marshmallow Soda”, and Wikipedia, “the free encyclopedia”.

Author: Dave

Four hundred posts would suggest I have something to say… This blog was born from a desire to elevate the English language, highlighting eloquent words from days gone by. The stories I share are snippets of life itself, and each comes with a bonus: a dusted-off word I hope you’ll go on to use more often. Read “Deutschland-ish Improvements” to learn about my backyard European wish list. Try “Slush Fun” for the throwback years of the 7-Eleven convenience store. Or drink in "Iced Coffee" to discover the plight of the rural French cafe. On the lighter side, read "Late Night Racquet Sports" for my adventures with our latest moth invasion. As Walt Whitman said, “That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.” Here then, my verse. Welcome to Life In A Word.

18 thoughts on “Hopping on Pop”

    1. Completely agree. Peeps brighten an Easter basket (almost to the point of sunglasses) but eating them is a waste of calories. I’ll save mine for a chocolate bunny instead of a marshmallow chick.

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    1. The Wikipedia article actually talks about disintegration experiments in a controlled environment. The popular belief is they’re as indestructible as styrofoam.

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  3. I’ve never had a Peeps. I didn’t know they were marshmallows. The colour of Peeps just seems wrong for a marshmallow – so I’ll stick to S’mores and Rice Krispy squares. That reminds me, it has been a long time since I made brownies topped with marshmallows and chocolate icing… now I’m hungry…

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    1. S’mores and Rice Krispy squares – now THAT’S respecting marshmallows, Margy! And I agree with you on the Peeps colours; they are anything but natural. (Blue? Really?)

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  4. Hmm – I heard about this drink on the news, but didn’t know you couldn’t buy it. No, just no! Too sweet and I thought the idea of the Peeps Coffee Creamer was a bit much too. I think my love for marshmallow has waned over the years. I once wrote a post about eating “Fluffernutters” back in the day. You are younger than me, so may not remember them, but there was even a jingle. You put peanut butter on the bread/toast and then spread a liberal helping of marshmallow cream on top. I loved that stuff – you had to heat up your spoon to easily get a huge dollop of marshmallow cream out of the jar to plop onto the peanut butter.

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    1. I deliberately left marshmallow creme out of my list of respectable marshmallow foods because I never cared for the stuff. As you say Linda, it was tough to get out of the jar, and when I’d top an ice cream sundae with it the creme would morph into something hard and inedible. Maybe if I’d given a Fluffernutter a try I’d feel differently…

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      1. Yes it would have been a spin on PB&J … the same marriage of salty and sweet. I only ate Fluffernutters on toast, not bread and my mom would say to me “I don’t know how you can eat that Linda!” I rarely eat anything fun anymore either Dave, though I did buy myself a small chocolate bunny for Easter. I gave up sweets for Lent.

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  6. Very clever way to tie it all in! When I think of peeps and Pepsi I can only imagine sugar too, and probably a headache from all that sugar will follow. Don’t think it’s worth the risk for this combo! I will say, the birthday cake flavored Oreo is a winning combo!

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  7. Oh my, Oreos and birthday cake. Haven’t been down the cookie aisle lately so I’ll have a look. I’d agree that’s a much better sugar blast. Birthday cake works in ice cream so why not in cookies? Heck, birthday cake works in anything!

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  9. Never thought of that, but then again my middle name is “Gullible”. If your theory is true I’m going to write a whole new post about my love and admiration for PepsiCo.

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  11. Well, I got through Easter with neither a Peep nor a Pepsi being consumed. I always preferred Pepsi to Coke, but I agree that this is a fridge too far. And why didn’t they pick the obvious name: Peepsi?

    I can take or leave marshmallow, although they are good toasted in a fire. And Rice Krispy treats wouldn’t be very good without it.

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