“Thoughtless Driving”

One of the inconveniences of living in a small town is the proximity to airports. In western South Carolina we actually have a choice of six, including tiny Augusta Regional just beyond the nearby Savannah River. But whether Augusta or one of the larger airports hours away on the East Coast, the drive to get there is mostly two-lane blacktop, speeding along and then slowing down through the small towns along the way. Correction. You’re supposed to slow down through the small towns.

Blame it on puzzle apps. My wife and I were just thirty miles into our eastward trek to Charleston International when we hit the pretty-much-forgotten small town of Springfield, SC. The speed limit sign suggested 25 through its residential streets. I chose 38 instead. Okay, I didn’t intentionally choose 38. I simply elected to ignore the laws of little Springfield, in favor of focusing on the puzzles my wife was trying to solve on her iPad. Maybe I missed the speed limit sign, but I did see the spinning blue/red lights on the police car sitting quietly in a church parking lot.

Here’s something all four of my life’s speeding violations have in common. As soon as each of them happened, I pulled over pretty much the moment the cop reached for his lights. My thought process went, “Hey, I’m breaking the law”, followed by “Hey, that cop noticed me breaking the law” and finally, “I think I’ll just pull over immediately and save him or her any further trouble”.

38 mph in a 25; yeah, that’s pretty bad. Totally deserved the ticket. At least it wasn’t another school zone this time. My last two speeding tickets, one in the middle of 1992 and the other around 2013, were earned as I passed by primary schools with loads of children on their playgrounds. Even worse, the 1992 ticket was collected from the driver’s seat of a midlife crisis two-door convertible Alfa Romeo Spider. Bet the cop loved ordering youngish me to traffic school in lieu of the ticket.

Speaking of “in lieu”, my Springfield, SC cop (who had nothing better to do because there’s nothing at all to do in Springfield) gave me a no-brainer choice in settling my flagrant speeding violation. Option 1: Pay the fine as advertised and earn four points against my driver’s license (“Ouch!”) Option 2: Pay an additional 30% on the fine and avoid the points entirely (not-so-“Ouch!”) Maybe Springfield’s not a bad little town after all… even if the ticket mocked my violation with a description of “thoughtless driving”.

Here’s the nice thing about making peace with a speeding violation before the cop even reaches the driver’s side window: you have a pleasant conversation. Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?  Me: Why yes sir, I do, and here’s my driver’s license and registration. Officer: Okay Mr. David, let me spell out your options here (spells out options).  Me: Why thank you sir, I’ll take Option 2, if you please. Officer: Okay then Mr. David, pay the fine online and enjoy the rest of your day.  Me: And you too, officer!  It was almost as if a friendship was born over a speeding ticket.

I can’t talk about three of my speeding tickets without a mention of the fourth.  I made it through my high school driving years before ever getting pulled over – but just barely. It was on a graduation trip, where my parents loaned me their car and paid for enough gas to get me and a buddy a driving tour of the Western U.S. And right there in the middle of Colorado, streaking up the interstate towards the Rockies, I earned the blue/red lights for the very first time.

I will always remember two things about that first ticket. First, the officer gave me a personal escort to a nearby mailbox so he could watch me mail the check for the violation (no online or credit card option in 1980). Second, I turned to my buddy afterwards and said, “My parents are gonna kill me!”… which wasn’t true at all, but it’s how most teenagers feel after they get a speeding ticket in their parents’ car.

I doff my hat to those who make the effort to plead down a speeding ticket. I also admire those who continue driving after a violation, as if they don’t think the police car in the rear-view mirror intends to pull them over. Me, I embrace the fines for my brushes with the law.  It’s easy to claim accountability when you’ve only had four instances. And for the foreseeable future, I’ll be the most well-behaved driver behind the wheel.  You just won’t find me anywhere near Springfield, SC.

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Author: Dave

Five hundred posts would suggest I have something to say… This blog was born from a desire to elevate the English language, highlighting eloquent words from days gone by. The stories I share are snippets of life itself, and each comes with a bonus: a dusted-off word I hope you’ll go on to use more often. Read “Deutschland-ish Improvements” to learn about my backyard European wish list. Try “Slush Fun” for the throwback years of the 7-Eleven convenience store. Or drink in "Iced Coffee" to discover the plight of the rural French cafe. On the lighter side, read "Late Night Racquet Sports" for my adventures with our latest moth invasion. As Walt Whitman said, “That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.” Here then, my verse. Welcome to Life In A Word.

26 thoughts on ““Thoughtless Driving””

  1. I’ve only been pulled over once when I was probably 19 or 20 for speeding. My dad and I met with the prosecutor to see what we could do and the guy took one look at scared little me and let me off the hook.

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  3. My best story: In the late 1980s when I was in my 20s, I was driving a beat-up 1974 red Ford Pinto (the kind with the exploding gas tanks) on I-5 just north of Redding, CA. I managed to get the car up to 95 miles an hour (I was amazed it didn’t shake itself apart) when I saw a CHP unit on an overpass. By the time he caught up to me I was down to 70.

    He said, “Son, the airplane clocked you at 88, but I’m going to write you up for 75, because no judge is going to believe that this car can go that fast. So just so I know, how fast were you going?”

    I said, “95.”

    He said, “Impressive, don’t do that in my jurisdiction again. License and registration.”

    I think I may have saluted him and said, “Sir.” as I was handing over the documents.

    and I got a $150 ticket instead of a $350 one (and I think I avoided a personal invitation (arrest warrant) to explain myself to a judge). Personally, I think that cop told that story to people until the day he died.

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    1. Fantastic account, one that can only be appreciated by drivers who were young in the 1980s. Reminds me of my brother’s olive green Mazda with the Wankel engine (and where the heck did “Wankel” park itself in my brain after all these years?) Or AMC’s Pacers and Gremlins, neither of which gave the appearance it could get anywhere close to your Pinto’s speed. The fact you admitted “95” to the officer was bold but it sounds like you already had him on the admiring side of your “achievement”. I can just hear him saying, “I once pulled over a guy…” Glad the car held it together!

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  4. My husband and his dad got stopped for speeding in a construction zone while driving a Honda del Sol that hubby had just bought from his uncle. When the officer walked up to the car after they had stopped, and leaned over to see who was in the car, he started to chuckle. He said he was not expecting to see two old gents in a sports type car. He then proceeded to give them a very long lecture on why he had pulled them over, etc, etc – but admitted he hadn’t actually clocked them – so could not fine them!

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    1. We all have a story about being pulled over, ha. WordPress should make it a formal blog prompt. Also, it’s encouraging how most of these accounts (including mine) have the officer reducing the charge to something more palatable. Wish I’d gotten off with just a warning myself, but yeah I totally deserved the penalty.

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  5. Oh boy!! Great story, sorry about the ticket. I’m surprised he didn’t offer traffic school as Option #3, maybe they don’t offer that anymore. Quite an increase, 30%, smart way for them to earn extra money. I’ve gotten two tickets. Like you, I don’t try and haggle. I feel like they are a warning from the Universe that we’ve gotten careless in our driving and need to pay attention. Excellent ending. Aren’t we all the same, we don’t want to return to the scene of the crime.

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    1. Not much reason to return to Springfield anyway, so I’m good… except returning through it as I drive home from the airport next week (!) I wonder how many states offer traffic school as an option to the fine. Talk about paying the price in CA. The only available slot for traffic school was on my wedding anniversary. My wife never lets me forget it.

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  6. I came close to receiving a ticket one day. A police car, at least ten car-lengths behind me, suddenly turned on his flashing lights and siren. I couldn’t imagine what I’d done wrong. My heart started to pound as I pulled over. The officer, however, did not pull over, but kept going, and gaining speed. He wasn’t after me after all. I started to breathe again.

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    1. Ah, don’t we all have THAT story, Nancy. In my case, many times over. I always seem to think it’s me they have in their sights.

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  7. What a creative, albeit cagey, way to glean revenue for the city. I’d have taken that second option too as insurance rates are high enough. I’ve only received one ticket, for a rolling stop at a stop sign. I did stop, but was in Taylor, Michigan, famous for issuing tickets, often undeserving, for the revenue. This was a country road – really? No one else around … well he was around. When the officer came to the window he asked if I knew why he stopped me and I said “no” as I didn’t feel I had done anything wrong. He said “you rolled through the stop sign”… I burst into tears, uncharacteristic for me because I’m not known for weepy “girly”-type theatrics. I still got the ticket and I forgot how many points for a moving violation. That was in the 80s or 90s and today, people roll through red LIGHTS like nobody’s business – it is downright scary.

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    1. The red-light runners are scary, Linda. I’ve noticed drivers don’t pull into intersections to make left turns anymore, because they’re afraid they’ll get hit by the red-light runner you never see coming from the opposite direction when the light turns yellow. It’s a legitimate concern that can only be addressed by cameras or higher fines. And that same mentality is thinking of other ways to beat the system, just to reach a destination a few minutes faster. Hence the term “defensive driving”.

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      1. I thought it was only here in Michigan that the driving was so scary Dave. We have at least one fatality a week, either from red-light runners, or people going the wrong way on the expressway or busy thoroughfares. I always wait a few minutes before starting up after a red light and try to stay in the middle lane if possible – less impact for t-bone crashes. A friend of mine’s car was rear-ended by a dump truck as the driver was texting and ran up and over his car. He died a few days after the accident. Driving is no pleasure anymore. I think of our family going for a Sunday drive for years. Now the less time spent on the road, the better.

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  8. I swear those little towns are just speed traps. They are so annoying.

    Alfa Romeo Spider—-ooooohhhh. Wow. What’s the story behind getting that?

    I suppose you’re not going to tell us how hefty the fine was, eh? Though I can’t be the only nosy person wondering. 🙂

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    1. Yeah, the Alfa was an unusual chapter in an otherwise ho-hum history of practical vehicles. A fun, impulsive purchase in my twenties that didn’t last more than a year. Maybe the speeding ticket was a sign I wasn’t supposed to own it in the first place. This most recent speeding ticket cost me $200 in lieu of four points. South Carolina pulls your license at twelve points so that’s a significant hit and I was happy to have the option. Then again, SC also claims “… any time you are convicted of a driving offense, points WILL be assessed…” Not true 🙂

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      2. Traded the Alfa in for – get this – a family van. I’m sure the salesman got a kick out of that switch. I’m also sure he made me a lousy deal on the Alfa. We learn from the mistakes of our youth, don’t we? BTW, just spent two weeks in your fine city (Del Mar, to be specific). Beautiful weather and beautiful people, as always.

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      4. Well now, doesn’t saying hello remind you of “You’ve Got Mail”? We’re doing the keyboard relationship here and all of a sudden one of us goes “Maybe we should.. meet…” (hands pause above the keyboard). Is there some unwritten rule about bloggers not meeting face-to-face or is it more about taking a chance and affirming the person behind the words? We visit San Diego every summer…

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      5. Ha! Did not think of that. Great movie, though. I have met several bloggers face to face. Next month, it will be one more, who, I believe, lives very near Del Mar! It’s just taken us a while. I will be her 15th face-to-face! I think she’ll be my… pausing to think and count… fifth. I’m a slacker by comparison.

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  9. Ditto what Betsy said. We got stopped for speeding while on vacation in Dothan AL at 7:00 a.m. on Saturday morning when there was zero traffic around. Didn’t cost us much but confirmed my commitment to never visit Alabama again. Their loss, I tell ‘ya!

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    1. Despite my closing line I will visit little Springfield SC again. It’s right in the middle of the most logical route east to Charleston from where we live. But yeah, I get you with those pullovers where you wonder if the officer didn’t have something better to do with his/her time. In this case, I have to admit he was in the right place at the right time. Totally deserved the fine.

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  10. I clearly lead a charmed life. Despite my youthful tendency to determine the top speed of every vehicle I had a chance to drive (and some truly aggressive driving that makes me cringe all these years later) I have never been pulled over for speeding. And now I have probably jinxed myself.

    I did get pulled over once when the officer saw the truck license plate from the truck I had just sold on the car I had just bought (but had not yet registered). I got off with a warning to get my car registered with a proper plate. That was scary enough for me.

    FWIW, I would have taken option 2 also. I wonder if that option gets you a ticket for breaking a strictly local ordinance (like thoughtless driving) so that they don’t have to interact with (or share any of the fine with?) the State.

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    1. Good on you for avoiding speeding tickets (so far), JP. Like I said, I deserved every one of my four, so although I wasn’t happy to pay them I certainly didn’t argue them either. It’s a good point about the state keeping the payment (more likely the city of Springfield) from the fed. It wasn’t as if the officer checked a box to indicate some pre-established amount. He filled it in by hand instead. That’d suggest he was working around the system. For all I know he was lining his own pocket 🙂

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