Flying in the Face of Reason

If you’ve traveled across the United States more than a handful of times, chances are you’ve passed through Denver International Airport (DIA). There aren’t many connecting airports in the Rocky Mountain states, so DIA gets most of the east-west air traffic. The sharp peaks of the main terminal roof fabric serve as the signature design element, symbolic of the nearby snow-capped mountains (and Native American teepees from Colorado’s history). DIA’s land mass of 52.6 square miles is twice the size of Dallas-Fort Worth (DFW), making it far and away the largest airport in the country. A “cutting-edge” automated baggage system became an infamous failure back when DIA opened, causing a 16-month delay and ballooning the budget by $2 billion.

But enough about the facts.  I’d rather focus on the conspiracy theories attached to DIA; the conjecture to make your airport experience a little more entertaining.  Clearly, there’s more going on at Denver International than just takeoffs and landings.

Let’s start with DIA’s biggest conspiracy of all.  Remember the movie The Da Vinci Code with Tom Hanks; the wild-goose chase across Western Europe in search of the Holy Grail?  Tom should’ve included DIA in his travels because the newest Illuminati headquarters is located several stories beneath the airport.  The DIA dedication capstone inside the main terminal (and several cryptic words inscribed in the terminal floor) serve as hints, referring to funding from the “New World Airport Commission” (NWAC), a wholly fictitious organization (Google NWAC – you won’t find anything).  As is the case with conspiracy theories, NWAC somehow associated to the Illuminati, including their efforts to establish a single all-powerful global government.  Controlling America’s largest airport certainly helps.  That $2 billion of budget overrun apparently built the headquarters – a complete working underground city.

NWAC also associates to NWO – or New World Order – a more believable conspiracy theory tied to world domination.  NWO is said to be a resurgent Nazi group, so perhaps the Third Reich financed DIA as its future headquarters.  At least you’ll find symbolism on the map: DIA’s runways are laid out in the shape of a swastika.  (DIA prefers “pinwheel” as the more politically correct term.)  So, if not the Illuminati, the Nazis are amassing under DIA.  What say the rest of the world’s leaders?  Crickets.  They’re sitting back and letting the Nazis foot the bill.  They see DIA’s “underground bunker” as a refuge for their own safety during the next apocalypse (a conspiracy theory of its own).  They’ll pounce on the Nazi facility if/when they need to.

      

DIA contains a lot of artwork too, but the large murals in the baggage claim area are particularly disturbing.  Titled In Peace and Harmony With Nature and The Children of the World Dream of Peace, some interpret them as anything but “peaceful”.  The imagery suggests apocalyptic bio-warfare leading to mass chaos; step one of the NWO plan of world domination.  Even if that’s not your interpretation, you won’t overlook the image of the ghostly Nazi soldier, or the epitaph from a child who perished at Auschwitz.

Here’s one more conspiracy theory.  DIA has “Blue Mustang”, the 32-foot tall 9,000 lb. rearing horse as you approach the main terminal by car.  “Blucifer” is solid blue with creepy red eyes, glowing day and night.  Ask Luis Jimenez – the artist – why he chose blue and red, but he won’t reply to your email.  He was killed during the statue’s construction when a piece fell on him and severed an artery in his leg.  For this reason (and the bizarre colors), Blucifer is said to represent the Fourth Horseman of the Apocalypse, from the biblical book of Revelations.  So, take comfort; Death awaits you at the door of DIA (or at least in the morgue supposedly hidden somewhere inside the facility).

For more details on Denver International’s conspiracy theories, check out the entertaining Buzzfeed article here, or the Business Insider article here.  My favorite part of the Buzzfeed article: the comments that follow, where several way-too-serious types debate the legitimacy of the claims.  To them I say, life’s too short.  Let the conspiracy theories bloom, if for no other reason than we might grin a little more as we bear our oft-nightmarish airport experience.

Some content sourced from Wikipedia, “the free encyclopedia”.

Author: Dave

Three hundred posts would suggest I have something to say… This blog was born from a desire to elevate the English language, highlighting eloquent words from days gone by. The stories I share are snippets of life itself, and each comes with a bonus: a dusted-off word I hope you’ll go on to use more often. Read “Deutschland-ish Improvements” to learn about my backyard European wish list. Try “Slush Fun” for the throwback years of the 7-Eleven convenience store. Or drink in "Iced Coffee" to discover the plight of the rural French cafe. On the lighter side, read "Late Night Racquet Sports" for my adventures with our latest moth invasion. As Walt Whitman said, “That the powerful play goes on, and you may contribute a verse.” Here then, my verse. Welcome to Life In A Word.

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